Wedding Dress be Damned!

During my first wedding dress fitting, the consultant asked if my weight typically fluctuates. No. It doesn’t. I’ve been within the same 2.5 pounds for the last 10 years.

When they initially took my measurements to order the dress, I was told that my hips measured 1 inch into a dress size that is normally 3 sizes too big for me. Despite the fact that it felt like an open hand slap across my bridal face, I told myself that wedding dress sizes are weird, that they were the professionals.

Fine, order it in that size.

Six months later, as they laced the dress onto me and let go, it couldn’t stay up on its own.  As I attempted to hide my satisfied smirk (turns out I don’t wear three sizes up after all), the seamstress got busy pinning and bunching and pinning and bunching until she had reconstructed most of the dress.

During the process, the consultant made the inquiry about my typical weight fluctuations. Turns out, the dress had to be taken in so much that it couldn’t be let back out.

Translation: If you gain an ounce between now and your wedding day, this is going to be really uncomfortable.

No problem. My weight doesn’t fluctuate. Take it in!

As my second fitting approaches, so does our wedding. We are T minus 3.5 weeks and I’m starting to get a little loopy if we’re being honest here. I’ve still been making meal plans and doing my best to feed my 6’3” fiancé, but in the last week or so I’ve found myself saying things like, “Can we just order a pizza instead?” or “Oooh, Willies! Let’s get milkshakes!” or, “I’m still tired. I don’t want to go to bootcamp this morning.”

On its own, none of those things would be abnormal or alarming. But the fact that each of them has occurred within the same week (the week leading up to my second “don’t be fat or your dress won’t lace up” fitting) has me a little concerned. The other aspects of our life and wedding planning seem to be getting more overwhelming, so the idea of escaping into a pile of ice cream or melted cheese or an extra hour of sleep has been more appealing than normal.

I’m not usually a highly groomed kind of gal. Don’t get me wrong, I can use mascara and wash my hair just fine, but makeup trends and manicures have never been my thing. Unfortunately, the idea of being at an altar in front of every person I know has spooked me into the beauty world in an all inclusive way. I’ve had more beauty appointment trials than I care to count. And that’s nothing compared to the week-of-wedding appointments! We’re talking manicures, pedicures, waxing, spray tanning, hair trims and eyelash tinting to name a few. I’m starting to feel a little bit like plastic Bridal Barbie.

The point is, I’m being tanned and trimmed until about 2 hours before my wedding, and the idea of it is getting exhausting. I know they’re all elective procedures, but it’s nearly impossible to escape the idea of being my “most beautiful” on my wedding day. Like I’m not beautiful enough on any other day? It’s a defeating thought if you let it get to you.

So you can imagine that the last thing I want to say to myself right now is, “You’d better eat a stalk of celery instead or someone won’t fit into a certain special dress on Friday.”

Therefore, in an effort to save my sanity and to continue enjoying the build up to my wedding day, I made brownies. And I ate two big ones. And I am going to enjoy that decision and the chocolatey goodness without guilt or worry. I’ve gone on pizza binges before. I’ve missed bootcamp before. And no, my weight does not fluctuate.

Wedding dress be damned! I’ll be beautiful on my wedding day no matter what. Even if you are a little snug…